25 November 2011

Highlander

The following are my tweettastic real-time reviews of Highlander which I watched for the first time about two weeks ago. (I've reversed the order so it reads like a normally written post. You're welcome.)

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Who's ready for twitterspam? And guess who found out they have Highlander on Netflix instant? (Hint: these things are connected)

I tried watching this once in college and fell asleep (I was drunk, cut me some slack). Have never tried again.

Impressed with opening music. Might be my new ringtone.[Note from the future, it is.]

#Highlander already contains wrestling and bizarre sexualization of children. Weird things to forget, me.

Scotland looks nothing like a WWF match.#obviousmaybe

.@raging3vil I'm already super entertained by the hair. It can only really go down from here.

heh. Our "hero"(?) just did way more injury to himself than the bad guy did.

Christopher Lambert has the same kind of look about him as James Purefoy. I like James Purefoy.

While I was distracted we've killed the bad guy and caused his soul to... go into a car? Wait, what?

@nerdheroine You've NEVER seen Highlander all the way through? O_O #lossofnerdcred

@glossaria Fell asleep, blacked out, you know... shit happens.

Connor rides lack a sack of potatoes. I'm a little disappointed in him.

Ooh, nice armor. Good choice in bonewear for the fashionable evil overlord.

"Nobody will fight me." *is immediately stabnated by the first person to fight him* #hahaha

@nerdheroine THANK YOU! I have been laughing at that for years now.

@Anachronistic Ok. I'm glad I'm not the only person who thought that was silly. And HILARIOUS.

Who called the cops? There was no one in that parking garage.

Awesome mohawk on the somethingth century priest. Was LA running low on out of work actors?

Connor's headless explanation makes as much sense as anything else.

Ok guys, if you ever travel back in time, it's impossible to menacingly put a tape into a tapedeck.

I was going to make an exception for Mr Blonde but he was futzing with a radio, not a tapedeck. #ReservoirDogs

80s hookers had the best* clothes.(*ymmv)

This is movie is just making me want to make out with James Purefoy. #Highlander #nottheintendedresponseimsure

How does a Scottish guy pronounce Glenmorangie wrong? I have serious doubt about this documentary's verisimilitude. #Highlander

In retrospect, I think I have seen all of #Highlander2

"Hey, hold it right there. Come back here." The police kind of suck in 80s New York.


Wow, somethingth century justice was fierce. Although justice may not be the word I'm looking for.

Oooohh... can I have a secret room like that for all my treasures*? #Highlander (*comic books)

"I am Juan Sanchez Jose Carlos any-other-Spanish-sounding-names-you-can-think-of Ramirez. Ignore the accent. I'm totes legit."

But loving the peacock feathers Ramirez. Work it baby

Immortals are always extravagantly wealthy. I could live a thousand years and I'd still be broke as shit.

I am endlessly entertained by Sean Connery's protestations of not being Scottish.

Your woman is laughing at you man. Better sharpen up.

I hope he makes you go get that sword McLeod. What are you two doing fighting on top of a cliff anyway?

Apples always seem anachronistic to me in period films. But I guess they're not.

For the love of... When you get killed I'm not going to feel the least bit sorry. You had loads of chances to get out of there.

Where the hell is Connor in this lightning storm? Eh? Eh? #suspicious

Goddamn it Heather, I told you to get out of there.

Effin' Nazis man. Always screwing shit up.

I think antiquities chick has a Bat'leth on her wall

And on an even MORE AWESOME note: Firefox already had Bat'leth in it's dictionary. At least, it did... #StarTrek

Best earrings ever! ultimatequeen.co.uk/videos/images/…

I understand the New York is a unique place, but why would the New York police dept need an expert in ancient metallurgy?

Heather didn't die (then). I'm disappointed.

Best. Duel. Ever.

I have a feeling guy with the automatic is going to be sorely surprised here shortly.

I like old skool, non CG pyrotechnics. They're pretty rad.

I just noticed 80s women have the exact same hairdos as somethingth century Scottish men.

My attention is wandering. I think this about when I totally nodded off the last time I tried to watch this.

Ugh. I just noticed the safety pins hanging from Kurgan's throat wound. ew ew ew

Oh shit. I don't think Connor knew Heather got raped.

Who interrupts the evil looking guy indulging in an even eviler laugh in church?

Ugh ugh ugh! And now licking the priest? Dude. Pithy comment and pirouette non-withstanding, you're bizarre.

T-800 Terminator @nerdheroine Sarah Connor?

I interrupt your #Highlander tweetspam to say, @T800_Skynet just asked if Connor was Sarah Connor. And I'm literally LMAO.

Judging by how his floor fits together, I think Connor has a hidden staircase built in there.

Stab guy then kiss him? Seems very backwards. And now the sexing.

Women in movies are dumb as rocks.

Oh wow, everyone's make-up and prosthetics are showing in this final fight scene.

Kurgan is a dumbass. Or as my grandfather would have said, "Ain't the sharpest tool in the shed."

There can be only one! #Highlander #glassplosion

Those cartoon monsters are pretty awesome.

Nothing you've done is going to stop that chick from dying in ~60 years. You know that right?

Hrmmm, #Highlander was okay. Not awesome enough for me, but not quite bad enough to be awesome either. Would not say no to seeing again.

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